It's been a long while since I last posted. Life is hard. My whole life was turned upside down in the past month. February was a month of heart ache and the beginning of a hopeful renewal. I never envisioned my life taking the road it is now on.
Mouse has continued to grow and learn everyday. She is chattering more and more and I can't wait until conversation isn't one sided any more. Communication is such an important thing. I know it is frustrating for her at times to communicate what she wants or needs in a way that I can understand. It is equally frustrating to me as well!!! She was in the hospital at the end of February. Her "asthma like symptoms" went haywire and her oxygen level was too low so we were admitted to the hospital for three lovely days and two nights. Defintely not a vacation! I slept in a crib with her in the crook of my arm or laying on my chest one of the nights and the other night she slept no more than 3 hours total. It was an exhausting experience and one that left her scarred to the medical profession. When we went back to our family doctor for a follow up she screamed and tried to scale me like a mountain. She has always been so good at the doctor, even following shots, but no more.
As for everything else, God is tearing down in order to rebuild. It sucks. I'm not happy about it. It hurts. I don't want to deal with it all. It is a daily struggle to choose to deal with it in a godly way. I really want to kick and scream like Mouse when she doesn't get her way. It would feel good but only for a moment. So for most days I am choosing to keep my feet still and my mouth quiet. I'm not perfect though and have had literal moments of kicking and screaming from anger and hurt.
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