Busy Day with a side of poop and puke

Today was another busy day. Adria and I cleaned some of the house this morning, showered with the new shower head, and then she took a nap while I finished more chores and wrote my sister a letter. When she woke up we headed out the door to run errands. Off we went happy as larks...little did I know the day would wind up with puke and poop. We went to Jo-Ann Fabrics to buy the dog some fleece for a blanket and some material to match my bathroom colors for some curtains. We were doing very well. Adria was excellent despite the forever long line at the fabric store. She flirted with all the people in line. Overall excellent errand running behavior. Then it happened sometime between the fabric store and my mom's house. She pooped. Folks, we're not talking a little poo-poo in the diaper we are talking about stored up poo since the beginning of time vacating a little body ALL at one time kind of poo. It was rough. So I gather her and the diaper bag unaware of the severity of this poop. I could smell it but I didn't realize it was coming out in every direction. You may ask how could you not notice that but let me tell you I had a screaming infant who needed changed and fed and I was trying to get everything out of the car so yes I missed it. We quickly get to the room my mom keeps the diaper stuff in and I lay her down and then realize the severity of the poop. It was up, down, sideways, every which way. It was a 20 wipey poop as my niece would say. I finally got it all cleaned up and a fresh diaper on and I pick up the screaming infant and STILL smell poop. I hold her out away from me and ask my mom to see if she can see any poop on the backside and then I saw there was poop on the outside of her clean diaper!?!? Then my mom spied the source of the leftover poo. ME! I was the source. I guess when I picked her up out of the car and put her on my hip the poo got all over my shirt. Not only that but it leaked all the way through to my bra. LOVELY! So then I was scrubbing at my bra because obviously it is not sanitary to breast feed a baby with poop on your bra. Then my shirt and her outfit made a quick trip to the washing machine. AHHH! No more poop! Our day continued and we headed home around 4ish. Josh was home already working in the yard. Then, I decide to do an impromptu weeding session of the jungle in the backyard. Yes, it does look a wee bit better but still very jungle like. The dogs were out and about with us. I go back inside and Josh returns to mowing the lawn. Duke our lovely dog is inside with us. Adria is in her high chair while I was starting dinner. Then the wretched sound of the dog barfing!!! EWWWWW! No, it wasn't food coming back up but mud and weeds. WHY DO DOGS EAT GROSS THINGS!!!! Duke is now barfing his brains up so I throw him onto the deck to finish so that it isn't ALL over my carpet. Josh stops mowing the baby is still in the high chair by herself in the house while I'm making sure Duke doesn't run off and hide and eat more dirt outside. Josh took over dog duty and I went back inside so that I didn't neglect my child any more. Needless to say Duke is alive unless Josh decides to kill him. In the middle of eating our dinner Duke decides to go for round 2 of the great puke and proceeds to throw up all over the kitchen. *sigh* At least the baby is in bed and I'm off to play another game of phase 10 with my husband who is trying to beat me but I will prevail and still be phase 10 champ!!!